Optimal Outcomes by Jennifer Goldman-Wetzler PhD

Author:Jennifer Goldman-Wetzler, PhD
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: HarperCollins
Published: 2020-01-12T16:00:00+00:00

Prepare the Content

Finally, prepare the content of your conversation. Remind yourself of any overlaps between your own and others’ values. Starting the conversation by highlighting what you think you have in common can be powerful. If it seems appropriate, let the other person know you appreciate that they may really care about X (whatever you have identified as their ideal or shadow values). Even if you are naming that shadow value for the first time, as long as you are honoring it, rather than using accusatory language, it will likely be helpful. For example, when Bob told Sally he would be sure to take her long-term financial needs into account, even though it was not something she was accustomed to discussing, he said it in such a respectful way that she was able to acknowledge it.

Also, let others know about any of your own values that seem appropriate to share. You can make a request for them to acknowledge your values, even if they don’t agree with them. But remember, your goal is to free yourself from conflict, not to convince them that you’re right.

At some point in the conversation, you should feel a sense of “breaking out” of the conflict pattern. It might even feel as though the loop that had been going around and around in circles has suddenly been broken. Once this happens, allow the conversation to wind down. Going forward, this conversation can be a reminder of your best intentions.

Download

Copyright Disclaimer:
This site does not store any files on its server. We only index and link to content provided by other sites. Please contact the content providers to delete copyright contents if any and email us, we'll remove relevant links or contents immediately.